Flipping America 154, Confidence

podcast 154 confidence

Expected Air Date: 05/31/18


Hello Everyone. Great to be with you today. Today we are going to be talking about a quality that is absolutely important for any business owner,  Confidence.  You have to have it, but how do you get it? How do you keep it when life happens? How to you keep it in check – to prevent being over-confident? All that is coming up with a few lessons learned the hard way in just a few moments. 

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  • Want a quick analytical tool to tell you how strong a potential fix and flip deal is? Download the Property Grade app. You answer 10 simple questions about the property and the app instantly tells you what you can expect to make, your return on investment, your return on cash, and then the program gives the project a letter grade using the proprietary Flipping America Investment Property Grade algorithm. 



Topic: Confidence

Confidence is a vital quality for life but especially for business owners and operators. Confidence is an attracting quality that draws people to you. Properly sized and placed confidence provides inspiration, makes those around you more comfortable. 

For some people, confidence seems natural and easy. For others it’s a challenge and their self-messaging often tells them they will never be a confident person. This is one case where what you tell yourself will certainly determine the outcome. Even the naturally confident person knows fear. The difference is what you do about it. 

Difficult if not impossible to launch your own business without confidence. You must believe in yourself, your idea or business plan, and in your ability to make it happen. This belief must be so strong in you that you can overcome the inevitable hardship you didn’t plan to experience. 

Must be balanced. Over confidence can harm you and others. Cross the line too far and you’ll come down hard. 

So the first battle is to get confident. The next battle is to temper that confidence with a healthy dose of realism. 

How to get confident. Where does it come from? 

You don’t gain confidence from participation trophies. You gain confidence through actual achievement. 

  • Some is innate.
  • Natural abilities
  • Acquired Knowledge
  • Learned skills
  • Repetitive application of knowledge and skills to reach the “reflex point.” You no longer have to think about this thing you are doing, you just do it. 
    • Professional athletes. 
    • Skilled artists
    • Public speakers
    • Business leaders
  • Repetition creates Reflex leads to increasing confidence. Confidence feeds repetition and even greater skill level
  • Overcoming Fear
  • Faith
  • Encouragement from others. WaterBoy: “You Can Do It!”, 

How to NOT get over-confident. How is it tempered?

The DANGER of success. Over-confidence, over estimating one’s ability, over reaching. 

  • The Waterboy says “You Can Do It” but life sometimes says “You Can’t Do That!” Young children often seem confident without being overly self-aware. Life has a way of beating us down and sucking the confidence out of us. 
  • Realistic Self Appraisal. A Man’s gotta know his limitations, Dirty Harry
  • Going Trophyless. Not winning it all
  • Failure: Not winning AT all.

The Balancing Point

  • Confidence coming from experience.
  • Cautious courage in taking on something new.
    • Prepare
    • Mitigate Risks
    • Dip a Toe in. 
  • Periodic Self-Review
    • Be honest with yourself
    • Give someone else permission
  • Seek the company of superiors. Accept their input, trust their processes.
    • You don’t need to know why something works at first. Just follow the example of the person for whom it is working.
  • Lend a helping hand to others behind you but on their way up.
  • Embrace the occasional setback, conflict, and difficulty. As we climb the mountain we call life, it’s the bumps that give us a hand hold and then become a foothold, thus enabling our ascent.

Motivational Thoughts for the day

  • Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. – Winston Churchill

Comment Line calls and Questions

Call 404-369-1018, press 1 and leave your message!


Questions@flippingamericaradio.com Tell us where you’re from!

  • Alyssa, Milwaukee, WI, “I’m speaking with a lady who wants to sell her home to me. She’s in her 60’s and wants to move to a Senior living center. She has lived in the house for the past 35 years. She is a bit of a hoarder with piles of books and magazines in every room in the house. It’s hard to really know if there is any serious damage, but the house seems structurally sound. It needs some serious updating. I don’t know how to price this and I don’t know how to approach her with an offer. Houses are selling in the neighborhood for 400. There’s a new neighborhood going in across the street with similar sized homes going in the 600’s. My seller wants a fair price and I want to give it to her but neither of us have a clue what that would be. Oh and if it matters I’m planning to flip the house. 
  • Brandon, Kalispell, MT, “I was in Las Vegas last week visiting friends and they told me about your show and that you had mentioned our little town more than once. So I checked it out and you give a lot of really good information. But how on earth did you hear of Kalispell?”
  • Connie, Portland, ME, “When it comes to paint, do you specify a particular brand? There are so many – are they all about the same? And why would there be large differences in quality anyway? Isn’t paint paint?”
  • Hector, Jacksonville, FL “Can you connect me with a lender who will loan on rental properties — I have a lead on several here from $50,000 to $125,000 in price.?

Questions@flippingamericaradio.com Tell us where you’re from!


[0:00] Music.

[0:27] It’s time for flipping America the show that teaches you how to make money in real estate or wherever you are whatever your situation there is an opportunity for you.

Flipping America is brought to you today by Braswell Capital Solutions commercial lending made easy

on the web at Braswell Capital solutions.com and now

you’re sad flipping America guy Rodger Blankenship today I’m going to talk to you about a quality that is absolutely important for any.

Investor or business owner.

[1:07] You’re not going to be able to start a business without this you’re not going to be able to continue a business without this you’re not going to be able to inspire

your employees you’re not going to be able to find Capital you’re not going to be able to get things done you’re just not going to make it work if you don’t have this quality and

as I survey the landscape and look around a little bit at what’s going on in the culture today and and I just stand by and watch today’s college kids even I see a great laugh

of this quality.

Fortunately it’s not non-existent but it seems to be on the Wane and I have to think to myself remind myself that every,

generation of young people has created concerns and fears among the adults that are watching the generation so I don’t want to be overreacting to this but this quality is absolutely vital

and there are so many things in life that seem to take it away you can’t really have a great life without it and you definitely can’t run a business without it what am I talking about I’m talking about

confidence you must be confident.

[2:19] In order to make your business work in order to have a good or a great life you’ve got to be confident now of course,

overconfidence as it set of problems too so we’re going to be talking about the balance that is required between confidence and overconfidence,

some people you know honestly they just need some help building up their confidence and some people seems like a hopeless cause other people.

Need some help with their overconfidence are their unrealistic self appraisal and

sometimes that also seems like a helpless cause I want you my friends to achieve that balance and achieving that balance is always going to be a work-in-progress because.

[3:07] The if you think of it this way balance is like

right at the bottom point of a pendulum swing if you remember clocks that have a pendulum that swings right at the bottom that may be the balancing point but that pendulum is always swinging if the clock is working and so

you’re always wavering between the too much of this or too little of this and confidence is one of those things that requires some.

Continual vigilance in order for you to have in just the right amount.

We’re going to talk a bit more about that little later on but I want to say hello and welcome this is the show that’s designed to teach people about real estate I teach people how to make money in real estate and yeah we’re going to talk about confidence today but

confidence is important in every aspect of life and especially if you are a real estate investor because you have to have the confidence to pull the trigger on a deal

on the show I try to give you the best information and a news data and Trends and conversations with

people who are getting it done all across the country in order to help you make the best decisions that you can about,

your own investment or relationship with real estate that we don’t encourage everyone to drop what you’re doing and start flipping houses like you see on TV this isn’t for everyone.

[4:20] But we do encourage everyone to have real estate as a part of a balanced Investment Portfolio to that end

we are here to help you we’re here to serve you we have a lot of free resources free doesn’t mean they are lacking in value we just give them to you because you know we’re making money in real estate we don’t have to make money off of you so here you go.

[4:42] Some ways to reach us find us on the web at flipping American network.com this is the flipping American,

work it’s a network of stations and media Outlets that provide information about real estate investing you can also find this on facebook.com at flipping American Media you have to just add the word media there and then on Twitter and Instagram.

Flipping America we have a YouTube channel because many of the interviews that we do are also

video recorded we edit them and put them on the channel we’ve got a few more coming out in the next week or so we’re on LinkedIn where on Pinterest were everywhere on social media.

Just look for

flipping America and you’ll see the familiar logo and you’ll be able to access our information and content and if you’re not really all into the computer saying and you’re just listening on the radio right now and you just

prefer to talk to someone.

[5:38] You can always do that you can call or national comment line at 404-369-1018 we love getting your comments we love hearing what people are saying about the show we don’t

play woohoo I don’t know if we’ve ever played one of the comments on the show but we do really appreciate hearing from you and if you have questions about real estate you can always send your questions to questions at flipping American network.com this can be whether you’re

thinking about investing in real estate are you thinking about buying a place for you to live we’ve done both and we can help you with both and it’s not just single family homes

we talked about all types of real estate here on this show and I know we talked about single family mostly because that’s what we know best but we do talk.

[6:23] About and talk with those who are doing other types of real estate investing and if you have questions about those

we may not know the answer but we will get the answer if you will write your question and send it to questions at Flippin America network.com or leave it on the comment line

we will answer your question we have answered every question that’s ever come into the show and we will continue to do so as long as we are able and we don’t see that ability

going away anytime soon we’re able to handle your questions and we’ll get the answers for you and we’re here to help you and we really mean that couple of announcements,

if you’re ever in the Atlanta area on a Wednesday you can almost always come have lunch with me the flipping America guy and we have just,

rented new office space and have a new studio in Sandy Springs on the north side of town so now we have changed our location our Wednesday lunches are in Sandy Springs at a place called the Hudson Grille and that’s on Roswell Road in Sandy Springs if you’re in Atlanta you probably know where it is Roswell Road Sandy Springs

the Hudson Grill you can also find

information about this on meetup.com flipping Atlanta flipping Atlanta is are putting America subgroup for the Atlanta area school tool to help you.

[7:46] Don’t understand how strong of potential Fix and Flip deal is download the property grade app in the app store it’s absolutely free the answer 10 questions about the property and the app instantly tells you

how much money you’re going to make or how much you can expect to make what your return is on your investment also your return on your cash and gives the.

Project a letter grade based on a proprietary algorithm that we’ve developed to your flipping America also want to let you know you can download the flipping America app

it’s free and you can listen to the show and now folks we have all hundred and fifty.

[8:23] Music.

[8:36] Know what’s around the corner

but you can be confident that you’ll be ready for whatever comes your way Legal Shield and ID shield look out for you so you can get back to living life

LegalShield is a prepaid legal service for individuals

businesses for a low monthly rates you get comprehensive legal coverage professionals and provide advice whenever you need it.

Protect it for a number of legal issues and assistance with common legal needs for example

the preparation of your will is included with your LegalShield membership at no additional charge,

you can protect your business or start one select a variety of business legal plans to help you keep your focus on your business

Shield is a comprehensive Identity Theft Protection Service that monitors the information that matters offers unlimited consultation on how to protect your information and provides complete restoration I license

private investigators in case your identity is compromised.

For you or your family for your business Legal Shield is the solution for your legal needs just go to Rodger b helps. Com right now just sign up that’s Rodger b.

Dot-com Legal Shield protection for every part of life.

[10:02] Music.

[10:25] We have so much news and so many questions to cover today I’m pretty sure we’re not going to be able to get to it all and so let’s Dive Right In,

and let’s talk a little bit about what’s happening in the world

real estate let’s do the news the national real estate investor online,

I’ve got an article he recalled the 10 must-reads for the cre industry today

10 must read Caesar it’s a LinkedIn different articles Eddie Lampert hitch fund as ESL received numerous inquiries from potential partners for Sears asset sales next city planners property developers fuel push for driverless vehicles

so I think the driverless vehicle thing is not going away and it’s so we’re just going to get better at this.

[11:13] And then there were three of the run-up in home prices is not sustainable sustainable according to a Realtors Chief Economist home values been rising for six straight years the game’s been accelerating the past two years unlike the last housing boom,

the games are not driven by fast and easy mortgage money but instead by solid buyer demand and very low Supply

still like the last housing boom summer starting to warn these price gains cannot continue of course we’ve been warning that on this show for a while we don’t forecast a crash but we do forecast to slow down in the rate of appreciation and

we said last May infect a year ago,

we said that probably by this may we would start see signs that it was going to slow down and I had a lengthy conversation with my local Atlanta realtor who confirmed,

some things that we’ve been seeing around the country the luxury Market whatever that price point is where you are the luxury Market is already beginning to slow down and get to what might be considered more of a normal.

Balanced real estate market so you can expect to list the house today and have it under contract tomorrow if you’re in that luxury price point however.

If you’re still in that.

[12:26] I started home or move up home range whatever that price point is in your Market you can still expect that you’re going to have a pretty quick sale.

If you can find something to buy all right next to MGM Resorts to buy the New York casino a New York casino for about 605 million

read that if you would like Walgreens mate I’m going to link all of this on social media later on Walgreens maybe building the store of the future in Florida but Wall Street is not.

Necessarily all that excited about it.

Text how the Federal Reserve could ruin the US economy economy within 12 months now this is an article that we probably need to read the FED is widely expected to increase rates at his next policy meeting on June 12th and 13th again something that we hear it looking America forecast

several months ago and we said that we expected the interest rates on

on standard mortgages to be around five five and a half percent by the end of 2018 so we’ll see.

[13:27] Markets are bidding a more hawkish fed for the balance of the year 2 and I’ve got another story hear that,

mortgage applications are down I’ll get to that in a few minutes next five things to know about investing in single-family rental homes this just an article for you to read and if you were thinking about that,

maybe you want to read this number of the Nexus the number eight kentec outsmart the housing shortage.

[13:50] My answer is probably not because Tech does not create housing.

What creates housing our Builders and we just need more Builders to get into the game.

I had a different conversation with someone in another part of the country last week who said that they were looking for ways to get involved in

building new houses because and then they were acting like this was some great discovery,

and I just I couldn’t help but think about how many times I said on the show if you know how to build houses and you can build an entry-level product.

And make a profit.

Then get going because there’s a fortune waiting for you because there is such Demand right now and next article V Wall Street fifth wall Ventures launches a new real estate.

Check investment fund a real estate Tech investment fund those are always fun to read about honestly.

I I can’t help but wonder how do these people

sell these ideas because some of the ideas are pretty far-fetched and they raised millions of dollars around it is serious is it just seems to be the people.

Are more in love with the idea of some technological Marvel or Miracle that’s going to solve real estate

rather than just investing in something that’s actually going to make money in real estate.

[15:14] Okay for realtor.com the latest real estate Trend coloring books for grown-ups I’m going to link this article to you but.

An increasing number of adult coloring books Focus solely on real estate and cityscapes with titles like houses houses houses and

color at home and fantastic cities the books offer a creative diversion as well as a way to experiment with color palette.

Pallets real estate agents in firms are taking it step further using the books in business okay well whatever you know the truth is.

I like coloring and I can pretty much stay in the lines I just don’t guess I’m surprised to know that there is a market for adult.

Coloring books like you know do we have something else we could do with our time I don’t know,

what’s the harmony they can’t be any more harmful than sitting in Bejing in front of the TV for hours on end right all right from Forbes I’ve got an article called the State of the Union in real estate investing and

I’m not sure who would like to describe the president of real estate investing so he can give the State of the Union but that’s okay I’m just playing around.

This article is about what’s going on with real estate investing and I’m not going to take the time to cover the whole thing instead I’m going to send you a link to it through our social media so you can just jump on and read the article for yourself.

[16:40] I will tell you this though.

The author of the story points out that Zillow is jumping into the investing game Zillow is probably I would place them as a competitor with knock and open door and offer pad companies like that

the problem that the

the latter three I just mentioned is they need to be quaking in their boots because they’re relatively new and Zillow is a giant with a lot of money and Zillow is going to probably step on them you know I

Dakota phrase from Shark Tank to step on them like the Cockroaches that they are and that you know it always sounds cruel to when I hear that and I don’t really say that as it’s as coming from me okay I just quoted Mr onederful there but.

These other startups need to be worried if Zillow is getting into their space because they have enough money to just knock them right out of business okay we got a few more stories that I’m going to try to hit really quickly,

we’ve got to talk about this all important topic of confidence today and I’ve got your emails I’ve got a stack of them waiting for me and we’ll get back to them and just a

alright we’ll be back my friends hang on.

[17:49] Music.

[18:06] Flipping houses I want to show you how to flip houses and there’s probably no one in the country better qualified than me to show you I flipped hundreds and hundreds of them,

and I also have some training and degree and experience and education so I could show you how to do exactly what I’ve done hundreds of times don’t believe me.

Head on over to flip starter event.com but in the meantime Give a listen to Pat caywood my name is Pat caywood.

[18:32] Cleveland Tennessee and I’ve been.

Doing some flipping since about March of this year and had started with a Nationals program that was very expensive.

I’ve spent today with Rodger Blankenship learning about his program and boy do I wish I’d met Rodger.

[18:54] He has a clear concise program and many tools that are going to be very hot.

[19:00] And starting and managing a program and the mentorship and Leadership and coaching that he saw frame are invaluable.

Thank you so much Rodger for your time and sharing with us license and certified Bank trainers,

teach you how to increase your sales up to 300% in less than 90 Second Bank the Revolutionary sale system Les Brown calls a game-changer is now in Atlanta.

Call 770-648-3636 to schedule an introduction to bank training or visit us online at bank code.com.

Forward slash M3 let us help you take it to the bank.

[19:47] Music.

[20:07] Hey Rebecca have you ever wondered how’s the category of seniors housing Compares with other sectors of investing well I’ve got a story from National real estate investor that compare senior Chelsea with all the others.

The reason this is a thing is you know the baby boomer generation is aging and is starting to move into senior housing in fact I think one of the questions in the queue for our e-mail today has to do with that very topic but.

I’m not at not on the large-scale that this is the.

Seniors housing is actually projected to not do so well in 2018 but it’s going to take off after that according to this study

they have the data and they have the reasons for saying that and that it will be number two of the compared sectors in the article you want to know what number one is.

[20:59] Manufactured housing in other words it’s what we used to call trailers.

And if I ever sound critical please know that I am not because hey I grew up in a double-wide trailer so

I didn’t see anything wrong with it at the time and this is still something that is

widely and use cross this country the puzzling thing to me is that manufactured housing could have such strong returns comparatively since.

We had guests on the show talking to us about the fact that most municipalities have made it impossible for new trailer parks to get built still that sector is very strong San Francisco house price

house price spike is the third highest in the nation that’s not really news but it is.

Very high and of course San Francisco is expensive to begin with I like this story.

[21:55] It’s about Redfin at those of you that know me or those are either listing here in Atlanta.

Part of the mentoring program here I talked a lot about Redfin and we use Redfin it it’s a good tool for non Realtors who are trying to.

I get comfortable values and sales there are other things out there course you can use Zillow don’t trust the zestimate

and I was actually at a conference last week and talked with the representatives from Zillow and and we talked a little bit about this estimate and some of the problems with that that’s outside scope of this show maybe we’ll come back to that one of these days.

Redfin is another source that I use for valuing property in Destin tools that I really like,

it’s all been a fan of Redfin for probably 5 or 6 years now maybe maybe even longer and Redfin is it they’re raising money and they’re growing and they’re actually starting to turn profits and this article.

Is written by a registered investment.

[22:59] Advisor name FS Max Max makes and that’s from Seeking Alpha which is one of my favorite go-to sources and he says that Redfin is poised to become the,


Of real estate now you think it’s going to take 10 years but that definitely got my attention and maybe want to read the article and probably will make you want to read the article as well.

[23:25] Here’s a surprising little bit of news mortgage rates just took a little bit of a dropped even though the mortgage interest rate dropped slightly.

Mortgage applications are decreasing it decreased 2.9% for the week last week but it’s down almost 10%.

Year-over-year from last year and so I’ll share this article with you on it from CNBC.

Picked up a story from the real deal out of Chicago,

condo deconversion so I don’t know if you’ve heard of condo deconversion but they are now all the rage in Chicago’s hot rental market and the reasons for that

are twofold first of all there’s strong demand for rental properties but also there is a listening to man for older condominium units because the newer condos have better amenities and.

More modern floor plans and things that are just,

difficult or impossible to attain in the older construction so they’re taking these condos and they’re buying the entire building out and converting them to Apartments I find that interesting and it’s all the rage in Chicago and I think.

Probably a little bit of a harbinger of things to come in other major metropolitan areas,

particularly where you have buildings with older condos.

[24:44] I have a couple of other stories that I picked up from Seeking Alpha and you know I have told you many times I like Seeking Alpha and I go to it that doesn’t mean I like it ever agree with everything that they say and,

they have a couple of Alters who are talking about basically it’s a gloom-and-doom message of forecast about the housing market and this one is,

as a headline the housing bubble pathology start to bite yet another sign the cycle has.

What’s the story about well it’s a story about one person in California can’t afford or some people in California who can’t afford to buy a home based on their school teacher salary all right.

[25:26] I’m not denying the reality of that or the discomfort that these families face but anecdotes do not create data and 2

presume a nationwide crisis based on the anecdotal evidence of a few families in California or even if we were few hundred families in California does not mean that we’re in a bubble it’s certainly something to be concerned about but it is not

it does not portend disaster for the housing market the other article is.

Similar to it it’s called The headwind facing housing and what is this headwind facing housing Rising interest rates they talk about Rising interest rates but listen folks.

People are always going to be buying houses.

When interest rates peaked back in 1981 interest rates peaked at 18.5% I know.

[26:21] Most of you listening to this.

Probably don’t remember that but even then people were buying houses even when the interest rates were at 18.5%,

think about how hard it would be for a realtor to sell a house thinking about how hard it is to get a loan and think about how much less house you can afford if you’re paying 8

teen percent my goodness 18% well now we’re getting all concerned because interest rates may be heading up to 5% whoopty Doo.

Listen folk people are always going to win we want to be buying houses this is no time to panic the market is still strong

I will stay on top of these things and of course I’ll report to you when I see actual indication that we’re heading to correction will be right back

are you one of the 70% of Americans living paycheck to paycheck and tired of the stress if so I understand as I used to be in that 78.

I start investing 2003 with my net worth with -80 thousand.

Since then I’ve built a business that generates over $500,000 a month in income and allows me the freedom to do what I want I’m Brad Chandler and I tease people just like.

[27:39] How to find Freedom through real estate investing using a tactic that doesn’t require credit or tons of cash for a free training on how you too can do this please visit Brad channel.com for freedom.

[27:49] You never know what’s around the corner but you can be confident that you’ll be ready for whatever comes your way Legal Shield and ID shield look out for you so you can get back to living will

LegalShield is a prepaid legal service for individuals

businesses for a low monthly rates you get comprehensive legal coverage law firm of professionals they can help you with a variety of issues and provide advice whenever you need it.

Protect it for a number of legal issues and assistance with common legal needs for example,

the preparation of your will is included with your LegalShield membership at no additional charge,

you can protect your business or start one select a variety of business legal plans to help you keep your focus on your business

Shield is a comprehensive Identity Theft Protection Service that monitors the information that matters offers unlimited consultation on how to protect your information and provides complete restoration I license

private investigators in case your identity is compromised.

For you or your family for your business Legal Shield is the solution for your legal needs just go to Rodger b helps. Com right now just sign up that’s Rodger b.

[29:11] Dot-com Legal Shield protection for every part of life.

[29:16] Music.

[29:58] Hey we’re back I’m Rodger Blankenship and I teach people how to make money in real estate and today I’m going to talk to you about confidence confidence is

a vital quality for life but especially for business owners and operators confidence is in attracting quality

I started to say it’s an attractive quality but you know it really doesn’t make only people attractive although it does make

you whatever you are whatever your number is on a scale of 1 to 10 it’ll probably give you a higher number if you have an appropriate amount of

confidence because it is and attracting quality that draws people to you properly sized and placed confidence provides inspiration.

Making those around you feel more comfortable for some people confidence seems natural and easy but listen don’t be fooled by this.

Confidence is something that most people have to work at a little bit okay and for others it’s just a challenge and their self messaging often tells them they will never be a confident person,

this is an area when were talking about confidence where self messaging is pretty much the whole game.

[31:07] What you tell yourself is going to determine the outcome.

And so over the next few minutes I want to help you tell yourself the right things to have the right amount of confidence.

Should we run away from Fear should we denounce fear no should we avoid conflict no no don’t worry about those things there many things out there that would tend to erode and chip away at your confidence don’t worry about those things those things.

If you keep them in the right perspective they’re going to help you all right I’m going to explain it’s difficult.

If not impossible to launch a business without confidence You Must Believe In Yourself your idea.

Your business plan and in your ability to execute that plan.

This belief must be so strong that you can overcome the inevitable hardship you don’t plan to experience.

Let me unpack that just a little bit nobody plans.

To have hardship if you read business plans and if you read life goals and and talk to people about what they’re planning to do and so forth those roadmaps don’t have bumps in them

they don’t have potholes they don’t have wrong turns and they don’t have any of those things that tend to jam us up in life.

[32:30] However the way to get through many of this hardship is to maintain your confidence. Confidence has to be balanced.

Overconfidence can harm you and others you cross the line too far and you’re going to come down hard and it’s going to hurt it’s going to hurt you it’s going to hurt it’s going to hurt your confidence.

And it’s going to hurt those around you so,

we have a couple of battles here the first battle is to gain confidence in the first place and the next battle is to Timber that confidence with a healthy dose of realism all right let’s talk first of all I had to get confident where does it come from,

If You observe young children you will often see a lot of innate confidence.

[33:14] Before they have lived much of Life they have a certain amount of confidence if you give a child something to draw within a piece of paper.

And don’t give them any any negative feedback they will bring that piece of paper to you with something drawn on it and most children will be convinced that.

Their artwork is great and should be hung in a museum somewhere.

They don’t need to be told that it’s childlike drawing and you know that’s not the way in horses legs actually look they don’t need to hear all of that.

But the kids didn’t have that confidence something about life tends to take away that confidence and and will think about that but you know.

You don’t gain confidence from participation trophies you gain confidence through actual achievement.

[34:08] All right I’m not saying that I’m totally against participation trophies but you know there’s enough talk out there about.

[34:18] Well.

Okay I’m not a big fan of participation trophies because life doesn’t give you rewards for just showing up you don’t get blessed just because your breathing.

Okay it’s going to require some actual achievement so let’s think about this some of our confidence is just in born.

I talked about the little children and the confidence that they seem to have to conduct certain things and.

Confidence begins to chip away when children reach their limits or find things that they can’t do or do things to hurt themselves or damage themselves in,

that’s when fear comes into the equation a little bit and fear can chip away at our confidence as well confidence also comes from natural abilities you know.

[35:08] You probably have some natural abilities maybe they’re not the same as mine we’re almost certainly not the same as mine we’re all a little bit different you have your natural abilities I have mine.

[35:18] All of us can acquire knowledge and acquired knowledge can be a source of confidence as well and learned skills

there’s a little bit of a difference between acquired knowledge and learned skills skills are things where we take the knowledge.

That we’ve acquired in and put them to use in some way this practical a learned skill could be in a building a birdhouse you know and,

either you acquire some knowledge about how to do basic woodworking things and then you learn how to build a birdhouse the first birdhouse you build probably in going to be great.

But if you build a hundred birdhouses number 100 will be better than number one,

right and that gets us to our next Point repetitive application of Knowledge and Skills to reach the reflex point now

reflex point is just a phrase that I kind of made up but you want to do it to get to The Reef reflex point

when I was playing basketball we shot free throws until we had what the coach called muscle memory where.

We could basically close our eyes stand at the free-throw line and just go through the pattern of

shooting the free-throw and we could make a surprising number of free throws from 15 feet away with their eyes closed because we had done it hundreds and hundreds of times when I play college basketball at the end of practice after wind sprints,

we were all expected to stay there and shoot 100 free throws now there were a couple of guys on the team that stayed there until they made 100 free throws.

[36:46] Hey baby I was one of those maybe I wasn’t but the point is

we shot a lot of free throws and when you do something over and over to metal with a shooting free throws or analyzing a deal if you do it over and over again you begin to get better at it and when you get better at it.

You you start to create of this or get to this reflex point and what do I mean by that.

When you’re at the reflex point you no longer have to really think about this thing you’re doing you just do it you see this was professional athletes.

[37:23] They they just instinct when they see when they’re like boxers when they’re standing there boxing they’re not thinking about every jab and every block they just instinctively react to the movement of their opponent

this is true with basketball players or football players any sport that I’ve ever played.

[37:40] Once you get to the point where you react and not think then you’re going to be a better player if you have to think

the place going to be by you before you have time to really think it through okay this is true with artists as well with public speakers

is Business Leaders in any Walk of Life if you do something over and over and over again to your reach this

reflex point where you have muscle or brain memory and you just know what to do you know how to respond are you know how to act

and you don’t have to even think it through because of your experience in your practice in your repetition that’s going to make you more efficient with this activity and that

that leads to increasing confidence.

Increasing confidence is going to make you want to do it even more and so it’s going to increase your repetition and you’re going to achieve even greater skill levels can you see it say

a self-replicating success cycle here because you had gained some confidence then that want makes you do it more often which gives you more skill which gives you more confidence

all right all of that is a good thing it begins by.

Thinking about what your innate abilities are and then building on those with acquired Knowledge and Skills okay now.

[39:01] Another way to boost your confidence is to learn how to overcome fear.

[39:09] I know that if you’re sitting there listening to me right now you’re you’re thinking though there’s a guy who’s never nervous about anything and it’s true you know I’ve been a public speaker for 25 years I spoken all over the world unless you’re the universities are spoken in large churches

and I’m up on my feet in front of crowds all the time and you know public speaking is supposed

people’s number one fear but I seem to be in my natural element with it but I want to tell you it wasn’t always so.

I took introduction to speech 101 when I was in college and let me tell you.

My first few attempts to get up in front of a group of people wear.

It was a lot of sweat a lot of fear and a lot of concern and a lot of effort and the only way I could do it is just to stand up there and do it.

The reason I was able to is I learned from my childhood to face fears and overcome them all of us have faced fears.

Not all of us have learned to overcome them.

[40:13] I can tell you stories about fears that I had as a kid that would make you laugh because they were so silly.

And the things that I was afraid of and I could tell you stories about the my own children in the middle childhood fears that they had and it what we had to do to help them overcome them.

Much of our journey in life is overcoming fear and what I see when I’m helping people get going in their own real estate career is fear.

They’re not necessarily afraid of anything that they can

put their finger on or describe there’s just a general fear because it’s something new and there is

probably some possibility of damage and if they’re putting their own money out there at risk then there is a lot of reason to be afraid

and so when we developed our mentoring program with this thought in mind that we’re going to do what we can to kind of remove those barriers and those risks and and come alongside the people that were training to help.

With that fear wrapped up in all of this is a word I can’t think of a better word for it so I’m just going to call it faith.

[41:25] Faith is basically just a simple Trust.

You have to trust that the outcome is going to be okay and you do this without knowing for sure that it is.

[41:38] I remember what is the first time I jumped off the big rock into the cartecay river is 20 feet above the water and.

I knew that if I stayed there and thought about too long I probably just

walk back down so I let one other guy go who was from that area and it done it many times just to prove that you can survive by doing this and so as soon as he went I was next I just went up there and jumped off the edge and into the water

and I it was actually kind of a rush to jump from that high up in the water for the first time but.

[42:10] You don’t the only way to to deal with the fear like that is to just do it the first time I went for a ride on a zipline.

They kind of demonstrated everything and none of us had ever done it before and it’s a long drop to the valley floor beneath this this was in the mountains of Tennessee and we were going to be zip-lining over valleys and

men I was nervous and they asked for volunteers and so I jumped them said I’ll go first the reason.

Because I didn’t want to sit there and think about it any longer I just wanted to do it and by friends that’s how you have to overcome fear I’ve been able to do this with the number to them things like this including buy my first house.

When we get back from this break I’ll talk to you in a bit more about overcoming fear and having faith hope you right back

not too long ago we did a one-day flip starter in Chattanooga Tennessee and low and behold one of my old College friends came out to the event his name is Peter Faulkner and here’s what he had to say about the event.

[43:16] Falkner here I tended a one-day flip starter training session led by Rod.

[43:23] And I was amazed to see what has happened in Rogers Live from the last.

[43:28] Flipping over 800 houses and then this one day training he told how he did it and what.

Falls the blessings the benefits and how to do it.

[43:42] Press with how well organized and how smooth the training winner day you’re tempted or in courage to go.

[43:51] Music.

[44:11] Old Adam Sandler movie called The Water Boy and I don’t I think it’s.

Not Adam Sandler it’s the other guy that’s in the movie and he says throughout the movie you can do it and that becomes kind of the phrase you can do it and if that builds confidence.

[44:32] That is an example of encouragement.

This is another source of building our confidence somebody telling us you can do it now of course.

That can be a little unrealistic if somebody told encouraged me to go try out for an NBA team right now and said you can do it well that would Nest you know you can say that all you want to but encouragement

will not help you do the impossible.

You know and through stubbornness and encouragement you’re not going to be able to stop the lava flows in Hawaii right now that are chewing up roads and destroying houses there there is a balancing point to all of this but getting back to the zipline story.

I did not check out every inch of that cable that I was about to trust my weight in my life too.

[45:23] I just rested I trusted that I wouldn’t die and fortunately I didn’t,

I’m cable didn’t snap under my considerable weight and I made it all the way to the other side and I did it again and again and I even got more comfortable with it and even got more confident with it and it’s funny because we’re talking about confidence the very first

time that I went I actually sat down on the platform and just kind of edged off by the end of the day I was taking a running jump and jumping off because I was touched the cable and I trusted it so my trusted grown my confidence of grown,

it doesn’t matter what it is folks if if you get some skill and you get a little repetition you’re going to get more confident about it all right now,

that’s half the battle the other half of the battle is how to not get overconfident

how do you temper overconfidence or how do you know how do you control this thing there is a danger in success the danger and success can lead to overconfidence over.

Estimating one’s ability and over-reaching.

[46:28] This happens all the time it happened to me it’s happened to close friends of mine.

We achieve a certain amount of success and we start feeling bulletproof and we didn’t reach out and try to do some things that maybe we could do if we had gone about it a little bit more cautiously but right now we can do.

[46:49] Yep okay The Waterboy says you can do it but life sometimes says you can’t do that.

[46:57] Young children often seem overly confident but then they get into school and they go to an art class in their art gets graded and then they realize oh well I guess I’m not an artist after all.

I’ve had I’ve listened to people talk about.

The source of confidence being self-awareness I don’t believe that I disagree with it in fact self-awareness does not make you confident

I think that self-awareness is a contributing factor to keep you from being overconfident and in some ways self-awareness

erodes our confidence because as we become increasingly self-aware part of what we are aware of is our shortcomings and.

When we realize our shortcomings we tend to kind of lose confidence in certain areas of our life.

[47:50] That’s not necessarily A Bad Thing.

We don’t need to hurry up and give children a healthy dose of self-awareness because we don’t want to chip away at their confidence in their exuberance and their love for life it’s going to happen eventually life has a way of getting us that message.

[48:08] Realistic self-appraisal.

[48:12] I think of the phrase that the Dirty Harry used in an old movie I am really major little bit today but in this movie Dirty Harry said,

a man’s gotta know his limitations that is a great phrase everyone needs to know their limitations you maybe.

Good at something and then you may have practice it and become a really good you may be great

you know I’m pretty good at doing math in my head and I can stand in front of a room of people that I’m training and I can do percentage calculations and get pretty close on on.

You know.

4 digit or 10 digit numbers and do a pretty good job of rounding off again so what I have some confidence in that and that’s great but I also have to know that there are some things that I’m not really good at

and that’s something that we all need to do a realistic self appraisal.

We’re good at some things we’re not good at other things we need to know what we’re not good at we need to identify it we need to be honest with ourselves about it first and honest with others and then as we’re building our business we need to staff to our weaknesses.

Find people who are good at what you’re not and bring them in.

[49:25] My partner and in this company is a gentleman who is very good with implementation and detail.

I am very good with ideas and original thought and when it comes to the implementation of all these ideas I tend to lose interest because I had another idea well that’s just part of who we are and so.

Take some realistic self appraisal and use that to temper your confidence now another thing that is.

Going to kind of help you control your overconfidence is I call it going trophy list and what I mean is not winning at all you know.

[50:08] Erase only has one winner.

A game only has one winner and so the other person is not necessarily a loser but they didn’t win.

And when you don’t win when you’re not the best its.

Something that actually helps you to control being overconfident to realize you’re not the best at everything you step up there and try to do.

That’s okay another thing that’s going to affect your confidence and can keep you from being overconfidence is the occasional failure going trophy list is not winning it all

the failure is not winning at all.

Will you try something and it just it bust it loses it it hurts and embarrasses you.

[50:57] Failure is nothing that we plan for I mentioned earlier about the 3-year plan or the business plan nobody writes failure in there

we don’t even put you know mistakes and wrong turns but we definitely don’t put failure in there yeah I have yet to see a business plan where somebody was trying to raise capital and he said in 18 months we will be Belly Up and file bankruptcy,

nobody says that nobody is planning to fail however failure is a part of every life and failure is something that is.

[51:30] Almost unavoidable for people who try things the only way to avoid failure is to never try anything.

So when failure happens what do you do is your life over woe is me I think I’ll end it all now know the failure happened because you tried something.

It’s not pleasant it’s not good and it’s not easy to recover from and it can be a serious blow to your confidence but as you begin to build your confidence back you build your confidence back with the memory of that failure in the tin what it felt like in the things that,

we’re going on there and the realization that your overconfidence probably contributed to the failure in the first place

so that helps to keep you a little more balanced and so let’s talk about that balancing point the balancing point is.

You get confidence by acquiring and developing Knowledge and Skills and then you get experience to increase the skills.

[52:30] You maintain your confidence by taking I call it cautious courage and taking on something new when you’re about to expand your horizons a little bit and then maybe develop a new skill.

Take on something new this way prepare yourself.

[52:49] Understand what the risks are ahead of you and mitigate them as best you can and then dip a toe dip a toe in,

then when it comes to getting in the swimming pool I don’t think that you necessarily need dip a toe and it’s a lot easier just to take the plunge and get on in there and that’s fine because you’ve been in pools before and if you’ve been in this particular full before you probably know the water’s going to be cold.

So go ahead and jump in that’s easier than using your way into a cold pool and so,

I’m using this as kind of a metaphor but I don’t believe in dipping a toe in when you get in the pool I do believe in dipping a toe when you’re getting into some new area of business or life skill just give it a try.

Don’t expose yourself to too much risk try it.

[53:36] Step back analyze review how do we do then go in when you do your review also conduct a self-review and you’ve got to be honest with yourself.

You need to have some time in your life where you turn off all the external stimuli turn off the music turn off your headphones turn off the TV sit somewhere quietly,

maybe they put a mirror in front of you and look at yourself and tell yourself about yourself talk about your strength talk about your weakness is conducting honest self appraisal and know where you stand and know what you like.

And figure out what you going to do about what you lack and how you’re going to strengthen the parts where you’re already pretty good.

[54:16] And the other thing that you need to do in my opinion is you need to give someone else in your life permission to speak into your life.

[54:25] We don’t always really know how we come across to others we don’t always know how we’re doing.

We need someone that we’ve given permission to to be honest and tell us about ourselves not criticism.

Constructive feedback you know.

I am not ashamed of the fact that I’m not all that interested in style and fashion but I do want my clothes to match and I don’t want my wife to be embarrassed when I walk out and she.

Steadfastly refuses to tell me how to dress and I appreciate that but on the other hand after I

putting myself together in the morning and I’ll walk over to her and say I look okay.

And if she likes it she’ll tell me and if she doesn’t she’ll say that’s not my favorite shirt or that’s not my favorite color combination see that’s constructed that wasn’t critical didn’t hurt my feelings a bit so I go try again.

[55:22] I know right but I keep my clothes basic,

just because it’s easier to put it all together and I don’t have to waste a lot of time thinking about you no coordinating an outfit all right anyway that’s just me and us but give someone permission to speak into your life.

Now the next thing is I want you to seek the company of superiors,

that in other words people that are better than you people that are ahead of you people that have accomplished more seek their company and when you do

accept their input you don’t seem to prove to them just acknowledge that they’re ahead of you that’s okay and actually might be good for their ego but accept their input and trust their processes you don’t need to know why something works at first

just follow the example of the person for whom it is working.

If you want to be wealthy find a wealthy person and do what they did if you want to be confident find a confident person and emulate their.

Behavior if you want to be anything find someone who is that thing and be like them so find someone who’s ahead of you that’s why I mean when I say,

seek the company of superiors in at the same time I turn around with your other hand,

and lend a helping hand to others who are behind you on this journey but on their way up.

So you got one hand reaching to those who are ahead of you and one hand reaching to those who are behind you and if both of your hands are occupied this way you’re going to have a better chance of achieving balance.

[56:51] Lastly I want to encourage you to embrace the occasional setback.

[56:57] Don’t run away from conflict and welcome difficulty I mean this.

[57:08] I’m going to say it again embrace the occasional setback welcome come from.

[57:16] And difficulty as we climb the mountain we call life.

It’s the bumps that give us a hand hold and then they become a foothold thus enabling our ascent.

[57:35] We don’t want the negative we don’t want the difficult we don’t want the challenging but it’s the negative the difficult in the challenging that shape us into the person that we are ease and comfort don’t whip ass into shape.

Challenge and difficulty Force us to improve to get better to get stronger to work harder to become more of the person that we were meant to be and we can be.

So embrace the occasional setback welcome conflict.

[58:13] That’s the way that you’re going to become the person that you need to be that’s the way that you will grow in skill and confidence that’s the way that you will become a successful business person as successful significant other or spouse or parent.

Or brother or sister whatever it is you want to do in life find a way to find your confidence and everything’s going to be better.

[58:34] Music.

[58:48] Winston Churchill said Success is Not final failure is not fatal it is the courage to continue that counts.

This thought and this show are brought to you by the foundation for renewal.

Working together with communities to improve an impact lives find them on the web every new will fund. Net your contributions and any amount are tax-deductible and always welcome thank you my friends will talk again soon.

[59:15] Music.

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